Happy Easter April 2011.joyeuses pacques.
Unwrap the kinder egg, settle down and enjoy.
Almost a Divorce!
JS decides we are to fly to the Uk to welcome his new granddaughter, Darcie, to his grandparents and then drive the 11 year old, newly painted racing green MGF back to st blaise.
Beryl, the MG,not the granddaughter, looks splendid and transports us two without a hiccup from Birmingham to Portsmouth ,to catch the overnight ferry to st malo.
We arrive early (most unusual for the Speers) and decide to look for an off-licence so we can equip the cabin with the necessaries. Then Beryl decides to get very hot under the bonnet and the clutch goes.
For those mechanically minded it was the slave cylinder.
5 miles from the ferry and two uselessly mechanically minded idiots are clueless of what to do next. I enquire if JS had the “I love MG’s”paint specialists checked the entire engine bits and pieces; JS said “why should they?” Silence. We finally rolled in first gear to the port and after advice from every happy passenger in the queue, we were PUSHED last on board, in view of a full ferry , to park overnight next to the HGV;s,what an embarrassment!
In silence we checked into the smallest windowless cabin/shoebox, equipped with bunk beds and next to the dog kennels! Mounting the top bunk was indeed a feat in itself, strapped in by JS, who announced that he did not want me falling out in the middle of the night and waking him! (no chance of a night pee then!)
Woken at 6am by the hi de hi announcement, we located the MG, asked if the cage fighter of the HGV could give us a push, he announced “sorry mate, off for me breakfast, and why are you parked ere?” we rolled past passport control, parked by the seagulls, and rang AVIVA, spoke to Patrick from Paris, and we were rescued.
We had the car fixed in Rennes; we visited the Bayeux tapestry, Mont st Michel, the DD beaches, the Loire valley, and le Puy en velay for a packet of lentils. We were once again a happy little threesome!
Darcie Reynolds was born on 19 march, after making her Mum and Dad wait for 12 days past her due date. We had given up any hope of seeing her after arriving a few days before her ETA,and waited patiently for two weeks, and as we passed through passport control at Birmingham airport on our way back to St Blaise, Darcie decided to get a move on and arrive that evening. True to form, she is a Speer,late for everything!
We spent a couple of weeks in Lanzarote in February, prior to a panic that my passport would never return from the UK, having had a dressing down from passport job’s worth, demanding to know why I had sent the passport from France, what was I doing there, and don’t expect them to post it back to France, and if I signed it in France then this was a prisonsable offence!
After checking online the facilities of her majesties prisons, the passport arrived, with an ID photo of Myra Hindly, it certainly wasn’t me!
Our new neighbours, Caspar and Ellen, a Dutch couple, have been applying for a carte Vitale (equivalent to the Uk NHS card) they are both residents in France and have lived here for some time.
Caspar was granted his CV, but Ellen was told she did not exist on any of their records. She made an appointment with the civil servant at head office in Toulon, armed with her passport, birth certificate and driving licence. She spent 30minutes explaining who she was and that she does exist.However, she was told that whoever she thought she was, she definitely was not Ellen leuberisk, because she was not on any of their files and that was the end of the meeting!
Did you know that to renew your driving licence here in France, you must have a medical done by a doctor specializing in persons applying for a car licence, a bit like a ppl (private Pilots licence) Ellen applied for one but was told she could not have one because she could not be driving here since she did not exist!!
During the sangliar (wild boar) season ,we were travelling back from Italy, after a light pasta lunch!, when JS saw a motionless sangliar on the side of the main road, then further down the road a car with half of its bumper off. So JS decides to return to the scene of the crime, edged on by Tash saying “You can get a lot of money for a dead sangliar Dad!” we return, by which point there are quite a few hunters sniffing around, so JS puts his foot and very small ankle on the belly of the beast and claims it as his own cos it was killed on his land (as if!) Tash confirms all this in french, the saddened french lot back off, when the beast decides it is not dead, throws JS to the ground and scampers off into the undergrowth, leaving a rather embarrassed veterinaire!or a miracle healer.
How do you kill a live crab and lobster? Gill bought us both for Christmas Eve, but left the preparation of both to Shipman. Having spent much research time on the internet, stroking and gently sedating the shellfish became the popular method. After massaging the crab for several minutes, talking to it and even giving it a name! JS was prepared to plunge it into boiling water. None of us had the courage, so we had bangers and mash!
The goats are maturing nicely, Blaise has horns, a beard and enough testosterone to father an entire herd, whereas Blackie just follows Blaise everywhere, eats all our pot plants, and repeatedly gets accosted by Blaise, never get castrated if you are a goat, life is never the same!
My continual battle with BMIBaby and luggage weight, we have now been given two identical hairdresser bags, which measure the exact required baggage allowance for on board.Now,these are no ordinary hairdresser bags, they are made of toughened plastic, , weightless, and capable of holding 3 hairdryers, multiple sized curlers, hair straighteners,and gels, or alternatively,JS’s shoes plus wooden shoe horns, multiple oversized reading matter, toothbrush chargers, snoring kit and emergency medical supplies! We may look like Mr. and Mrs teezy weezy, but we can shove these bags into any bmibaby ground staff’s faces, I mean size of bag checker. ureka.
Tash has just taken her mock baccalaureate exams, passed and even got through her Italian oral! She just uses french words and raises her voice at the end, it seems to work. The English oral was a sinch; she even gave the examiner a detailed description of Britain’s second city, with the examiner speechless that this french student knew so much!
Both girls are in love,Tash still adoring Cedric,and Tess in love with Keith,so all’s well.
Looking forward to the royal wedding, have got my Philip Treacy hat, the invitation arrived a month ago, practising the royal wave and JS has the champers chilling. The French cannot understand our excitement, and a national bank holiday, but let’s face it they are only jealous.
With all my love
Our lady from France xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Darcie. Wonderful day I spent with you, but don’t fill that nappy when Granma nessie is babysitting, time it when its Poppa’s turn.
Gerard. Really looking forward to taking you on a steam train here in july.
Tess. Love you.
Em and Chris. Have you thought of setting up an automatic feeder for the night feeds? www.parentshelpline.com
DD and Al. Kitchen nearly finished??And thank you mastermind for curing the computer.
Jand j . Tried to get to the gardens but no time after the car fiasco.
Buzz. Can you freeze whipping cream?
Kate and Big man. How is the computer nerd?
Cag. How is your babies head?
Joe. Thank you for your support. Xxx
JS. Go on a car mechanic course!
M&M. Doing a big casserole next week, ,please send some home grown veg through. xx