Olif Lockdown to World Lockdown

Posted by on April 30, 2020

April 30th, 2020. Corvid 19.

Quotes:

“One day this will be over, and we will be grateful for life in ways we never felt possible before.” – Olif et. al.
“If you’re going through hell, keep going.” – Winston Churchill.
“There are times in life when you have got to go through it to get it!!” – Mark H.
“What we need are recipes that take a week, not minutes.” – Clive Anderson talking to Ainsley Harriett. 11/04/2020.

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Captain (Corporal) Tom

We continue to thank our Heath Systems and their heroic work and Captain Tom, raising £30million for the NHS and becomes the oldest artist to claim a UK No 1 single.

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Silence(ish)

St Blaise remains more silent than usual, if that is possible, just the birds, Golden eagles, and JS’s snoring (somethings never change).

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Shopping

A weekly shop. JS refuses to wear a mask (not mandatory in France) but scatters the entire supermarket with 6 sneezes just opposite the fresh fruit shelf, but Olif then has the whole place to herself. It works a dream every time.

Vineyards remain open 7 days a week, thank goodness.
Garden centres and pool outlets allow you to order online and collect. Very necessary when Olif is ordering essential items (lotions, anti-wrinkle face masks, miracle grow, for the plants not me, although having read the ingredients of MG, they are not too dissimilar to what I take every morning!)

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Planting

Thank you Google translate for assistance with my french homework and Tash.
Collected 20 rosemary plants, spent 2 days making holes for the little beauties. Soil like rock here. It’s like digging a tunnel from the East to the West, but slower. Applied handfuls of virgin soil into each, watered, wished them the best of luck that we have a wet spring and lowered them into their new homes. They looked like soldiers all lined up for duty.
Checked them the next day, and all but 2 had been removed by a family of Sanglier. JS was so fraught that he could not even face his Weetabix. a 6000-volt electric fence is now in fully operational mode.

Franklin’s expertise on all gardening projects and DIY: he has muscles like an ox, capable of removing 6 foot cacti with one slice of a blunt axe (worth watching I can tell you).

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Bats

Removal of bats. A protected species worldwide, but I reckon they are on a short wicket just lately, so with the arrival of 4 yesterday, and we are only just recovering from the sanglier invasion, it was perhaps best if they found another home.
A joint effort from the Sieurac and Speer family and 2 dogs, a loud haler, a large waving French flag and shouting in English, French and particularly Chinese, one never knows where they have originated from, the army defeated their enemy within minutes of attack. Even Boris would be impressed with the speed of tactics and execution.


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JS is a dead man walking & Mary Berry

JS acts as chairman, manager, co-ordinating officer, an authority on almost everything since the lockdown! (how do they think us weaker sex existed before now?)
He is very enthusiastic, but pushes his luck when suggesting my 99th Mary Berry recipe, hugely adapted to supermarket availability, 

“Is delicious Nessie, but doesn’t look like the picture”

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My routine

I have tried to keep a daily routine during self-isolation as we are told to do by the powers that be:

  • Champers for breakfast
  • A good walk up the track in hope that I meet another human being other than JS
  • Gardening, but the coordinating officer seems to assign me to weeding all the time
  • Attempt to watch on line a video by some perfectly groomed beauty therapist (how can she look like this during self-isolation?) to self-wax certain parts of the body  (I can assure you it’s impossible to follow instructions and do the deed at the same time without getting hot wax on the iPad or anywhere else it shouldn’t be going!)

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WhatsApp

Next up is what’s app – family and friends…
Twinnies doing fine, apart from Indy sticking a popcorn seed up her nose and Remy tuning into a Zoom/ house party on Tessa’s mobile as she was in the shower and expecting her to join in!

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Croquet

A croquet competition, using a 50 year old set, rule book and one dead rat found in the bottom of the box! Rules for this game are impossible.

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Some true(ish) facts

Edwarde Phillipe has told us that May 11th is the date when selected less infected departments and the following can start to be allowed ‘out’.
Tongue in cheek as usual from Olif are the true facts!

Schools:   French children aged 6-10 only, have this golden opportunity to cram in 8 lost weeks of education, as well as their intensive home schooling into the final summer term, no half term, ending late June. Macron clearly has a great future sussed out for these chosen few.

Fabric shops: Selling material in the french flag colours so one can make one’s own face mask.

Electronic shops: Devices sold to attach to a face mask that detects all undesirables within a two-metre distance, then automatically stuns that person.

Hairdressers and beauty therapists, gyms and free personal trainers: So when this country faces the world the French population will look so well-groomed and wearing designer patriotic facial protection, we will look as though we have never been in a lockdown.

Viva La France.

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So Good luck to all ‘lock downers’ there is light at the end of the tunnel, and we will be kissing and hugging very soon, but even France may reduce their double cheek kissing to a good lip job, provided you are wearing your mask!

All my love, and see you some time this year, I promise.

Olif. Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxw

PS.
Mike. Thank you once again brother in law (err… Genius Brother In Law, ed.) for your post, and for creating the blog many years ago, constantly updating it, correcting my non-existent grammar, and for your love, loyalty and kindness. A huge kiss and a hug to you and Maudie. Xxxxxxxxxxx

A huge hug also to all our mates worldwide, constantly via telephone, WhatsApp, FaceTime, emails and all the rest of the latest communications available.
Please leave your comments below. Friends, family and well wishing newcomers to the site.

Invaluable. xxxxxxxxxxx

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Addendum

This is an extract from Riviera Radio’s website on Wednesday 29th April. If there any copyright issues Riviera Radio, please contact the editor via a comment on the post and I will comply with your wishes immediately.

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Coronavirus cases – Five people died from Covid-19 in the Alpes Maritimes and the Var on Tuesday April 28th. Both departments have recorded in total 391 deaths from coronavirus since the start of the epidemic.

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